Life Is

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You think these uni students lack vital knowledge, and then they show you glimpses of absolute genius. Never underestimate the uni student, their battlers, and they always find a way to survive, with the passing of assessment.

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Nearly every girl who I become friends with, I get a crush on. I don’t really understand that.

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The members in my group for this university assessment, have, in my opinion, horrible pieces of work. It worries me more that we all get the same mark, so what they do affects my grade. I have to voice my opinion so gently, because if I get too honest, they might start to hate me, and find any little error in my own work to get back at me. It’s hard.

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I have handed assignments in late and way over the word count, which is 20% lost before it’s marked, and I am still easily passing with credits or higher. I am baffled, it means heaps.

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As much as I prefer being by myself, every time I see someone with a friend, smiling and having fun together, I dont just get jealous, but it hurts me a lot.

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Life just has too many challenges and painful experiences. The concept of suicide only seems logical really. I wish I could do it, but it looks like I might have to pay someone.

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Today has been spooky. Six people who never appear in my life, other than a far distant past, have specifically said hi to me, or acknowledged my existence through some means. It is like God is weaving his web. I thought two was a sign, but six is different, like a far greater force is doing something. I just wish I knew why, a coincidence just doesn’t seem right.

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I am really happy. I have been since Wednesday last week. An emotion that is not depression is like pleasure lol. I have also realised, that I dont want friends, I couldn’t care less if I had none, but a girlfriend is what I want. But as much as that is a desire, I am getting used to the life I have now. I am very fortunate, I just need to be more appreciative of what I’ve got now.

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A woman with cut wounds all over her, with blood flowing from her mouth, holding a gun at me. Is it wrong for that to turn me on? Probably…………………………

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I need a sexy young woman.

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